Category Archives: Etc.

“No hay pedo, he won’t get far a pie”

TimeStamp: the new Latin Quarter on Siren Central Time.

… and the second rule of AA is? Actual TimeStamp: 21h00. Get–Up, now.

“Drink Water and then call yo’Daddy and ask him
for a Diamond Ring, a brand new car, Caviar,
after all, it’s good to be born A Mason.”
Daddy,
by Julie London

Next Stop, at the movies with ad blocks and limited leg room at The Forum.

… and boy, we [the staff] hope that you take them 1000 bills from Mustachio Rivera, but sadly, let’s be honest because at the rate that the Muller investigation is going, and as that dark fellow on the Weekend Update on the SNL puts it [“Che” we believe that he goes by] does have a point when it comes to the Teflon®️ quality of Donald Trump, “if the daily McDo diet doesn’t get him,” what will?… anygüey, Guapo, what’s the status on that stupid show that we [the staff] pitched to you starting YOU, —wearing nanas dress—eh?

At the movies, en francés:

The Second Rule of AA is?…
that there is no such thing as a Second AA Rule—¡Salud!!!
And don’t Drink Da Water, because Fish like to piss and them creatures also like to Fuck in it, too.

Gracias por las flores… TimeStamp: 21h30 CET

Hey, Lety… para decir adios: un Poisson de avril

En primera persona.

”there are places i remember…”

The Gospel according to: Saint-Sir-George, Saint Paul… and of course: John.

i did mention that what follows is Fusion Fiction… o algo así, eh!

… anygüey, Comadre, al regresar les Copains d’Abord le quitan la corona de espinas al Super Estrella al son de Salsa africana, pero no piensen que es de “harissa”, porque esa chingadera no pica, en fin Comadre, a Chuy hasta unos cacles de polímero y poliuretano le vamos a prestar.

apophenia of footprints far from the sands… context follows…

Hey, chica, the following is a NSFW segment before the local news on page 3, of la semana que Philippe irá a labrar, que conste Comadre, que la entrada fue preparada en time-delayed mode, ¿ok, computadora?

Actual Time now, Johnny—is 16h54 … 19h41 on Fip Central Time con la comadre Lety on da’ controls!

Wait for it, Comadre… wait, wait just until it’s time for “The Nightlife” and then, make it hurt, one–mo’–again, S.V.P.

}-–—~~~\*>

« For the leader; according to “Lilies.”* Of David. »

“Save me, God, for the waters* have reached my neck.”

Psalms, Chapter 69
Source: The Vatican Bible
Category: Fusion Fiction

[Canto de Sirena
en Versión Original con sub títulos en Castellano, no necesariamente —en Anglais o en Espagnol,]

— Sirena mayor:

Disclaimer,

In the written words of the “Mother” of all disclaimers: The Church of Latter Days Saints at the South Park —universe:

… all characters and events in this [show]… even those based on REAL PEOPLE – are entirely FICTIONAL…

TimeShift to May of 2001, “Mary Loves Scoochie: Part 1 and Two.” }—-~~~\*> Via: Third Rock From The Sun; at Mr. Peacock’s NBC… fair use of all media, Ms. Curtain.

and to Quote a “Guy” who Fucked a FISH Called WANDA, and even the Professor Slut (according to the newscaster Dan Aykroid) at the Research Center of the University of Third Rock From The Sun, [Seasons 3.23 and 6.17/18]:

… if you are easily offended, DON’T [Watch]

TimeStamp in Tucson, Arizona—it’s Calexico time on Fip Central Station Watch… 22h50

Yo soy tu padre y tu madre también:

Fair use del Canto de las Sirenas, vatos!

Las fuentes de doña Vilma y los enlaces del Dr. Liam Neesam, llegan en menos de un año de Luz en Issy–les–Moulineaux, eh.

1.

2.

3. Jane, you educated Slut; [Time–Shift, from the 70’s to 1996 thru 2001], via:

… etc., etc., etcetera.

Philippa*… and Helen** can Vouch for it

El Super Estrella era un Profeta, previo a su carrera de Icono Eterno, y La Magdalena (María, one–each) era bien JA-LA-DO—RA, ¡jaladora!, you hear? HaLaDoRah, para los que no speak–y the Spanish.

In any case Corazón, we [the staff] never thought that we’d make it this far, still, Sweetie Pi, hold that thought because we [the staff] have to say goodbye to March [womens month] in a Very–very, very special Weekend Edition of:

La semana que Philippa (y Elena) Labraron

[Voz de hembra
Miss March as Sarah Silverman]

But before we get along with today’s menu, here’s a preview of what’s coming in April; here’s a hint, it’s FUSION Fiction between La Femme Fatale and the Poisson de avril…

I Am The Walrus… context and source « you naughty girl » follows… saludos al “tumbador”… anygüey, this cunt of a creature is, in the words of “Over Mind TV (punto) com, nothing like “the little mermaid”, no Sir, “she’s a Man Eater. }—-~~~\*>. “Don’t belive the HYPE, is a Sequel,” and if you fall in love with a creature from the waters, make sure that it is a mammal, like a dolphin or a whale… a fish will stab you in the back, so if you must, Fuck’em and then Fry’em, or Stew’em, or turn’em into Soup… consider this a Public Service Announcement; you–are–welcome.

TimeStamp… is the « egg man’s » on Fip Central Station.

…in the Mean Time (20h00 CET) Saludos a Lety Delgado… for: “To Live and Let Die!”… do you do personal requests? Haw’bout David Allan Coe’s version of “You Never Called Me By My Name”, eh?

La Semana adelantada de El Mundo de Los Ecos del Pato Figaro de Le Monde… o algo así.

… aunque, Lety, este intercambio from you to me [TimeStamp: 19h56] in the cover melody of none other than “Phil…ippe A.,” is taking us nowhere, even if you’ve been given an extended “Ticket to Ride” [TimeStamp: 20h48]… context follows, Lety, pero lo bueno es que tus patrones, ni las Sirenas nos leen, eh.

}—-~~~\*>

Fuck… it’s 03h00 hours in CET and i’m way too fucking drunk to write let alone to continue, but for Bill Maher’s masturbation sake, check out this screen grab, it is right up his alley:

… context follows

———————————————-

Ahora, en time–delay y en Poisson de avril, aquí las fuentes:

1. Philippa y Elena: https://imdb.com/title/tt5360996/fullcredits/writers?ref_=m_tt_cl_wr

« La Jaladora » … de Redes es cortesía de un tal Garth Davis en IMdB… uso justo de todos los elementos, es decir, Sirena: la bendita Agua.

2. El sitio de La Magdalena… en contraesquina hay una Revolución en Proceso y se llama TESLA… if you don’t have faith, Google Map It, ya’ Bum!

Los pilares en París son así… uso justo de todos los Diablos de Invierno, y las Cucarachas en FIP Central TimeStamp of 12h18.

3. Bonus entry para doña Vilma y para “su” excelentísima editora en el Salón del Libro en París… casí esquina con el culo de Technicolor en Issy–les–Moulineaux:

Pedro en versión NOIR, casi entrada con La Puerta del Puente Nuevo y la Rue de Cinema

Don Cartón is not a Cartoon… but you’ve gotta have FAITH!, dijo Saint George Michael (Q.E.P.D).

Fuck it Bill Maher… It’s Time for Grand Theft Barco

Classified/Personal ads
Edición Paname 75 SDF

🐏   Meeeeh: i was docked near Pont Marie with a near empty bottle of amber rhum by my side. A rock-a-billy band played next to an improvised stage catty-cornered to a city utility room that during summer of 2017 transformed into a bar, your transparent friend waved at me… me thinks that he was Kin to the near empty spirits bottle next to me, i couldn’t tell because my eyes got fixed on you. }—-~~~\*>   Ewe: Strolled erratically, screaming obscenities at something or someone that for regular passerby’s seemed to be invisible or that they simply ignored because not one got out of his/her way. You were wearing some rather beat up blue jeans and a black torn tee under what any qualified coiffeuse could call a month-long Keith Richards–binge ‘do… me thinks you were sailing on Vodka and pair of Vans, or maybe they were Converse… can’t remember, because my eyes were fixed on that cutest caboose that you have for bum bum cheeks that grace your ass.

Anuncio de ocasión:

Ladies in Gemeni, this is an intermission and an SSA (streaming service announcement) all rolled up into one passionnata procession. Please be advised that next Friday, BMRT (Bill Maher on Real Time) and BTSC (Brozo The Shady Clown) are going to be off the interwebs in order to observe The Passion of a thing called International Hygiene Week, we repeat: Bill Maher en Tiempo Real y Brozo El Payaso Tenebroso van a Cesar sus actividades por los interwebs para poder observar la semana de Poncio Pīlātus… el lema del tema será: que chingue a su madre el que no se lave sus manus.

[Voz de hembra
Miss March as Laughter’s Mom]

… previously on:
“Another Lightning Round of Jeopardy
with
Alejandro Trebek”.

[Voz de hombre
Jeff Goldblum recaps how Armando Álvarez, playing the role of Will Farrell gave an answer on what el Año de Hidalgo signifies to “People in the know”… like say ex presidentes like Vicente Fox]

— Will Farrel as Clown Penis:

Because in the last year of a Six-year Mexican presidential term the masses always shout: ¡NO NOS VAMOS A DEJAR!

[Voz de hombre
Alejandro Trebek]

— Ok… but can you put that in the form of a question, Armando… i mean this isn’t the first time riding this horse, eh.

Here’s the thing Bill Maher, or rather a Mexican Maxim for you: DE QUE LA PERRA ES BRAVA, pues hasta a los de la casa muerde. Ask “the distinguished gentleman” from El Paso, BETO O’ROURKE TO TRANSLATE THE SAYING FOR YOU. Tell him that Armando sent you… anygüey, Bill, this cutline is within the context of your rather naive and silly question to Presidente Fox on whether he was worried about the Russians meddling in the next Mexican presidential election… Bill—You Dolt! Fox got it right when he answered to you that “We” [as in the Mexican political class, not we the staff] have our “own game”, our OWN COSA NOSTRA with El PRI; and Bill, here’s “thing two,” —YOU fucking Dolt!— Vicente Fox was the equivalent of the Russians in the last two Mexican Presidential Elections, he’s been cock blocking Andrés Manuel López Obrador since 2006… Vicente Fox is “the” VERBO TO YOUR USUAL SUSPECTS IN el PRI. }—-~~~\*> Bill — You Dolt! You hosted Keyser Soze disgused as a former Mexican President. You are worst than Kurt Russell on Tequila Sunrise.

… no se vaya, pero deteniendo y continue con nosotros por que al regresar:

[Voz de hembra
Sarah Silverman]

“El Verbo” a.k.a. “Chente el Zorro”, alias Keyser Soze en El Yunque y en El Opus Dei… }—-~~~\*> Uso justo de HBO (hobo en espagnol) y Real Time con un Dolt.

… it’s part two of:
“Another Lightning Round of Jeopardy
with Alejandro Trebek, and it is Mario Vargas Llosa’s turn at figuring out what « El Año de Hidalgo » means to a Washington guard dog, eh.”

uso justo de los de la casa.

———————————————

Las fuentes:

Lookin for Gemini: https://nytimes.com/2018/03/23/business/craigslist-personals-trafficking-bill.html?referer=https://www.google.fr/

International Hygiene Week: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pontius_Pilate

Tell me what Ewe, see? — Eye see where John buried a Blackbird

Samedi, 17 mars 2018

“Christ, you know it ain’t easy”...

“Christ, you know it ain’t easy”…

Interesting night—last night as we [the staff] went on the prowl for “Les Jupes de FIP”, an epic cris-cross around the 4th district in an attempt to reach the Sirens ensued… anygüey, long promenade short we ended up at “the” Historical Library of the City of Paris, instead of “the” Paris City Hall’s Library, and, necessary to mention, as opposed to the worn out “needles to say”, the Historical Biblithèque es uno d’esos lugares insolitos en la ciudad… The staff was fortunate enough to arrive for the second part of a Senegalese Kora player +1… the kora handler’s name is Lamine Cissokho; we [the staff] are on the hunt for the name of the +1… stay tuned for details; we are still trying to decipher the brochure official 3rd edition  of “the” Paris Music Festival on the 105.1 en frecuencia bien modulada.

So that’s where the Blackbird eternal nest is at! eh. }—-~~~\*> Foto y diseño por armando segovia / segoviaspixes… Keep on CopyingLefting on the Creative Commons trip.

Blackbird sources follow, gotta find the Walrus first…

Hypertunneling en el “Año de Hidalgo*” — with scattered Philippe’s…

… with scattered Philippe’s on the Cross Media Tangents, en la semana que aquí se Labró:

« A week scattered among several subjects. If we review them, we realize that they have a common point ».

TimeStamp: it’s the Actual 11th hour on Le Foux Du Fafa on fip time.

Phillipe Labro
16/3/2018
Edición Nº 2227
“La Semaine de Philippe Labro”
CNews—DirectMatin

* Attention, Brontis à La Préfecture, Attention, Attention—Attention. When we [the staff] make a reference to Hidalgo in this particular posting, for Friday, March 16th of 2018, we are not invoking the name of perhaps one of the most awesome Metropolitan city mayors in the world. Nope… so lets get that out of the way right from the get-go.

El Cura… context follows. Wait for it—Wait.

Context… si Las Sirenas nos lo permiten más al rato desde La Biblioteca del Ayuntamiento de París, porque hoy hay bullirengue en ese lugar a partir de las 20h, en fip—Time.

Stick around, context on El Año de Hidalgo en México, starring Alejandro Trebek en el rol de Gael García Bernal, follows—fellas.

TimeStamp:

The last revolutionary

…

Part Two:

So, Brontis, when we [the staff] mention Hidalgo, we are doing so in the Cross Media context of 2018 of the Year of Hidalgo in Mexico and of 2015 of the Year of Mexico in France.

“Sources” from L’Obs… should follow.

[Man’s voice
Alex Trebek en el Rol de Gael García Bernal]

—Welcome, to another Lightning edition of Latin American Jeopardy from the Seine, I am your host, Alejandro Trebek, and today’s contestants are: a linguist, cognitive scientist and expert in the things that do not happen in Mexico; like say, Justice, Institutional Accountability, and all of the good things that go with a fair wage, lets welcome professor Noam Chomsky.

Also, from the sidelines of the Organización de Estados Americanos, conocido entre literatos como el “Gran Pastor Alemán del Imperio,” y autor de La Aristocracia Perfecta… perdón, autor de frase “La Dictadura Perfecta,” y Premio Nobel de literatura: Mario Vargas Llosa.

And for our viewers in Switzerland, like a cherry on top of this Pie of Trivialidades, please give a hand to our current record holder for most missed responses – our biggest loser – Armando Álvarez, in the role of U.S. Air Patrol member, Major Clown Penis.

… but first a word from our non-sponsors:

SHE SAID WHAT!!!

… well, No Surprises, there. OK Computadora }—~~~\*> Uso justo de todos los Radioheads at 16h57 on Issy-Les-Moulineaux time.

Alejandro Trebek:

— Tell us Armando; how ever did you get into the United States Air Force? Let alone score a kick-ass fighter pilot certification for your DD-214?

[Man’s voice
Will Farrel in the role of Clown Penis]

— Uh… that’s Major Clown Penis, for you, Alejandro. And I scored the contact of a General in Ramstein Air Base thanks to my uncle Tibey Quinn. One of his golfing buddies owed him a favor from way back in the 1990’s.

Alejandro Trebek:

— What kind of favor; Armando? Or is it “Privileged information”?

Will Farrel:

— No, not all all, Alejandro. My uncle spared the life of a miserable bastard who dared sacked his wife in the late eighties; perhaps you’ve heard of of him.

Alejandro Trebek:

— ¿Tu crees?

Will Farrel:

— Maybe, I mean the guy was rather famous until Christian Bale started to look better sporting an old horseback uniform. His last name is Costner.

Alejandro Trebek:

— Let me check with the control room on that….

Alejandro touches his earpiece and asks:

— Have we heared of this Costner fellow?

— Ah, I see… no Armando, we’ve never heard of that guy.

— Anygüey… for 500 dollars; let’s begin the contest with the category:

— MÉXICO LINDO Y QUERIDO

Context on Gael’s appeal in Suiza… follows fellas.

Alejandro Trebek:

— We’ve already established that there is “No God In Mexico—ain’t no way to understand…” dijo una vez, Waylon Jennings, but can you name the reason for why every six years in la tierra del Tequila y del Nopal, people in “The Know” call it: ¿El AÑO DE HIDALGO?

The process… first draft.

[Will Farrel hits the buzzer first
… hillarity ensues]

— …

IN REEL TIME

TimeStamp: 2100 in Siren time… Lamine Cissokho and a bass player, if the staff heard right, his name is Janick Vera, we’ll double check with Valerie or Auréli at Opus 64…

Las Fuentes de Frida:

Frida’s context follows

https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2018/mar/08/frida-kahlo-intimate-belongings-on-show-at-v-and-a

Context follows.

Fuck it! It’s Weekend Edition and we pick up…

We pick it up with a fucking Hollywood werewolf:

Context follows… gotta go, the staff has to go and take care of some business, right now.

Once again, we remind all of the folks who don’t read us, that Wednesday’s CROSS MEDIA TANGENTS are unofficially synched with the Club Jazzafip edition of Pi Day, and the soundtrack from Certains l’Aiment fip featuring the music of Louis Malle.

El seno en frecuencia modulada… coseno disruptivo follows. }—~~~\*> Uso justo de todos los medios perfiles del torso de una sirena.

Once inside, funny (and racist) thing happened at The Forum

28 de enero, 2008
Sabbatical day #24*

The good thing about this blog…
is that “PC” Security does not read it.

ADVERTISSEMENT

Via:

https ://www .reddit .com/r/mexico/comments/7ta8rs/para_todos_los_indocumentados_en_usa_cu%C3%ADdense/

Given the intolerant athmosphere around the globe, the above is a PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT. }-~~\•> Image capture îs courtesy of Reddit and

[Voz de hombre
Armando Segovia]

– Last night i learned that racisim and intolerance has no color.
Meet the long lost sibling of Clayton Bigsby.
– The French, Black (White Supremacist)–

Digression:

MKF83; ID EQ: 222
Caisse:23 – 28/01/2018
09:13:38
Resto # 25000035
17 Rue de l’Arc en Ciel
75001 Forum/Les Halles

Apophenia, no Mr. “PC” Security, this îs not a Star-shaped, asterisk analogy of your professional conduct; these here, MuthaFuker is one of many actual consumption receipts that Yours Truly got as PROOF OF PURCHASE you Son of a Bitch. }–~~~\•> Photo by: segoviaspixes; Photojournalist–at–Large. •—_!_—• The Staff wishes to thank Blas Beamonte FOR allowing our shutterbug to use his smartphone and produce this snapshot… Sos lo Máximo, Che! Gracias.

… anygüey, the staff already covered the fact that the The American Embassy’s The French McDo’s slogan is: Venez comme vous êtes! Because as you all already know, it was the French who invented Nirvana, Kurt Cobain, and all of Seattle’s Best.

… the staff also explained to the lovely Sarah Silverman how The American Consulate how Starbucks, has an Open Door Policy to their Wi-Fi connectivity and to their «W.C.» porcelain and PVC tube network, anyone, and we mean anyone – from raggedy-ass clochards, to pretty-pink–baby—ass–smelling fancy BoBo’s – can walk in, sit down (what a concept, eh?) and feel free to discharge all of the French regional protected patrimoine consumed in the previous 24 to 48 hrs.

As a matter of fact, the good folks at the counter are nice enough to give out fresh plastic cups filled with water – Free Water!!! with UNLIMITED REFILLS – and did I mentioned that the French McDo’s are also decked out with urinals? Yes, you’ve read it right, equipped with urinals. We [the staff] however, have yet to find the mythical McDo with the squirting Bidet. Do let us know if you stumble across it.

No, i will not respect your cartoonish “authoritaaah”, Mr, “PC” Security.

ANYGÜEY: last night at the referenced McDo, listed on this digression’s sub-header, our Photojournalist-at-large, segoviaspixes was engaged in his usual nightly conversation with two of his Transylvanian acquaintances who, like our shutterbug-at-large, share the distinction of being part of a larger crowd of SDF’s (Sans Domicile Fixe) that roam the streets and live on Skid Row.

Now, for a little backstory on this, know that The Forum, at Les Halls, is one of the trendiest and most popular hangouts for wannabe ghetto gangsters, schizophrenics, crackheads, winos, plain crazy psychos, Eastern European clicks, professional stray kid thieves (urchins) and, your plain regular curmudgeonly hobo; AKA: the parisian clochard.

Segoviaspixes has seen them piss in just about every fake plant in the quad foyer area, and that’s all that he is willing to say because this post is not about listing all of the things that happen inside of “The Canopée,” which during the Fall we [the staff] identified as being in the form of a set of Snakes Eyes, and that the structure has a parallel alignment with L’axe historique de Paris or Voie Royale, etc., etc., etc…

Throughout the mall there are guards, —obviously— who try to keep things in check but for the most part, any incident short of a stabbing, a bare knuckle fight, or say: arson [por decir] and they pretty much let the above mentioned crowd do as they please. One thing they are completely intolerant of is for anyone, including tourists, getting caught sleeping anywhere in the premises during business hours… that’s what the fire exits are for!!! Just don’t get caught in there, that’s the only rule to follow.

Anygüey, there is this one security guard who for the past couple of weeks has been having a real rage problem directed at our photographer-at-large, he’s a young black fellow who as they say in San José de Las Panochas; Municipio de Mapimi, Durango, “climbed on a fucking little brick” and with the altitude attained  he has developed Vertigo from the rush of power and the “authorithaaa” that the Rent-a-Cop uniform has afforded to him.

And no, Gustavo, it is not “Just My Imagination.”. 

There has been times when people near our esteemed colleague, segoviaspixes, have been pissing next to a store front, but “Mr. I have a plastic badge and a CB Radio” will come directly to our friend and start giving him shit. Normally segoviaspixes just turns around and let the fucker the feller get tired of barking, which then promps the guard to just leave.

At this point, segoviaspixes would like to add that this particular security guard is, as the people in Costa Rica say: el único negrito en El Gallo Pinto (the single dark grain of rice in the stock), because the entire cadre of Security Personnel is actually very chilled and professional, as a matter of fact the entire labor crews at the mall are pretty understanding of the peoples’ permanently living, or who are temporarily going through the Mad Season of Skid Row, but this particular fellow who for his actions last night prompted us [the staff] to break the Sabbatical once again, is right there with the fictional and most controversial character of Dave Chappell’s repertoire: Clayton Bigsby.

Last night he approached segoviaspixes and immediately asked him to leave the McDonald’s that he was just chilling in. He claimed that the manager had made a complaint specifically against him for loitering and not purchasing anything, which was a lie; in addition; next to segoviaspixes there where the two Transylvanian buddies, but the security guard said nothing to them, at the three tables to our left, the usual crowd of immigrants that sits there (usually about 6 or 10) were consuming products from Pizza Hut; Quick’s, and KFC – AND WOULD YOU BELIEVE THAT THIS MOTHERFUCKER said nothing to them!

Here’s the thing, segoviaspixes can take the hassle that comes with the living, and the walking, and the troubles of living in the GREAT URBAN OUTDOORS, but what he can’t fucking stand is a racist Son of A Bitch who starts a sentence like this:

You are in France speak French or Leave… you people are not welcome in France. France is for the French and the Europeean – Not For You People. Leave.

Here’s the thing, segoviaspixes speaks a very lackluster version of the language of Molière; yes, but when he has to, he attempts to speak it, and he usually succeeds at it.

…and for the record, Mr. “PC” Security, grantees of the Talents and Competences Visa Program, which our awesome photographer–at–large used to be the bearer of, are not even required to ENTER into Le Contrat d’Intégration Républicaine, or even make a trip to the OFII. So Take That to your NexT motherfucking shift, Mr. “PC” Security.

One thing that segoviaspixes will not Fucking do, is speak, in ANY GOD DAMN LANGUAGE to a Fascist bastard who is on a “ Respect MY Authoritah” trip.

And one last thing, Mr. “PC” Security, your job includes directing people to the proper exits, and to let them know when the exits to the Canopée-Garden close, something that you Mr. “PC” Security fail to do; and, I’ll have you know, Mr. “PC” Security, that often times one of your supuervisors has asked segoviaspixes to please let the movie-goers know (when he used to charge his Gadget by the Porte Lescot Exit) that the access to the Canopée-Garden are closed for the night.

Sincerely,

Armando Segovia

asegovia3.wordpress.com
Editor of this fucking blog.