Luis Gerardo Quijano.
Candidato a Alcalde
La Magdalena Contreras:
PRESENTE.
The Street is my Gallery.
Intermedio… “La Magdalena Contreras”
Francia 2551 — Italia 6… Segundo tiempo… en vivo desde Bruselas
TimeStamp: 13h20 in Siren Central Den… ISSY, Corazón, T erra mia.
… bon appétit!
El talón de Italia.
TimeStamp: Una hora para el toque de las 4h20 en CET.
Clowns to the left — Jokers to the right… Hold your breath, here comes a bomb*.
* … not an actual bomb, but a figure of speech,
Colombia vS Polonia follows…
ijo’eh Puta vS Kurwas’
A ver quién gana.
Strip Jazz hour follows after the Carnaval at The Siren Den.
TimeStamp: 18h45 CET
BREAKING THE NEWS—BREAKING THE NEWS…
FRAUDE MASIVIO EN LA ELECCIÓN DE TURQUÍA
FRAUDE MASIVIO EN LA ELECCIÓN DE TURQUÍA
FRAUDE MASIVIO EN LA ELECCIÓN DE TURQUÍA
FRAUDE MASIVIO EN LA ELECCIÓN DE TURQUÍA
… Cometarío del Presidente de los ESTADOS UNIDOS MEXICANOS en proceso.
There has better be some « Black Satin » under that hide if Ewe are going to pull kthe Hobo Winter Warm Up multi-layer scheme, eh!
TimeStamp: 19h14 SARAJEVO TIME!… ¡Ah, caray! Sarajevo!?!?!? Not Sarajevo, Maestro—in Central Europe Time!!! What a maroon… [and Sirens, of course Ewe’all should know that Bugsy is hurling those Zingers from the mound, eh!
TimeStamp: seven minutes 19h20 in CET.
The new partnership vista con un retrovisor…
ISSY, for some unknown reason, Santa ‘motherfucking’ Claus—Ewe’all is coming to Town! en visperas del mes de Julio. Might the Sirens know something ahead of everyone else? Will Colombia walk out with a victory tonight in Russia and send the Polacs abusing Kurwhas all the way back to Varsovia? Will López Obrador finally take the siege at Palacio Nacional—o el sistema lo mandara una vez más a “La Chingada”, es decir, a su quinta allá en Palenque, Chiapas. Stick around, we never —in our wildest dreams would have thunk that the Sirens had an oracle among their lair.
… Minuto 10’
Colombia 0 — Polonia 0
DIGRESSION IN REAL TIME
DEAR, BILL MAHER:
Do Ewe know what the best thing about this blog is, Sir? That much like Rachel Maddow, or the Sirens at ISSY-LES -MOULINEAUX Ewe’all don’t read it.
Anyway, Bill, [may i address you as Bill? Of course i can—You’re a Werewolf!] we the staff feel about the G-20 pretty much the same way that you feel about a RECESSION.
If what the U.S. democracy needs (right now) to get rid of Donald Trump, is a RECESSION, then a Donald Trump is what was needed to bring the United States of America off of it’s pedestal, and dismantle at the same time the G-7 in Canada… now why would we [the staff] think like this? Ewe might ask?
Well, Bill, it’s probably because starting with the United States or, as “Exceptional” people in Alabama like to call it “AMERICA”; and of course Canada, i’m looking —at you too— France, they are the first countries to screw the local economies where industries such as the Coca Cola Company, the mining industry… and, and, and we [the staff] forgot France’s contribution to the regimes “South of The Border”.
So, Bill, if Trump is what it takes to dissmantle the G–20, the G-7, and the G–moneys like Carlos Slim, and the other three Owners of Mexico: so–be–it. The International Monetary Fund, The World Bank and yes, even…
minuto 39’
Colombia 1 — Polonia 0
NOTE FROM FENSTER the Copy Editor:
This digression in Real Time was interrupted by a score by the Colombian national team… we [the staff] return to our rant in Real Time:
TimeStamp: 21 hundred hours in Central Europe Time.
…digression continues after a look at where “The Maestro” is at with the unrobing of the 45th FLOTUS:
minuto 46’
Colombia 1 — Polonia 0
101 Dalmations! Say Bill just what a heck is a “dalmati…. oh, Eye See What Ewe did there—Bill. You are Evil. Respect!
minuto 69’
Colombia 2 — Polonia 0
minuto 74’
Colombia 3 — Polonia 0
Byzantine history with Bill Maher, only on HoBO TV.
minuto 90’
Colombia 3 — Polonia 0
Oye, Bill, a ti que te Gusta “el porro” —dice la “fiesta vieja” en Colombia, que eso por allá: “es sentimiento”…
… the good thing about this blog: is that Frank Ocean* doesn’t read it
* Frank Ocean, of course, being the reincarnation of Frank Sinatra robbing one of Andy Garcia’s casinos in Sin City, U,S,A.
mientras tanto en Toronto
TimeStamp: minuto 65’
Mexico 2 — Corea del Sur 0
… mientras tanto en Washington, North Korea becomes a Nuclear threat for the Trump hotel. It’s not even the two week mark since Donald was praising Kim Jung il for being a very nice guy with his own people and now we are back at square… wait! are there any square zero left: ehhhhhhh PUTO?!?!?!
TimeStamp: minuto 90’
Mexico 2 — Corea del Sur 1
Mientras tanto en fip Central Station… it’s Uno à Cero
We [the staff] arrived late into the first half of the match, however, the Sirens kept the tally up to a delayed minute… and the score, tastes just like honey.
Alemania 2 — Suecia 1
… Blueprints have been sketch en ese tipo de “tiros libres INDIRECTOS”, precisión Alemana. ¡Golazo! Si Suecia fuese un toro de lidia, la estocada hubiese sido FULMINANTE. ¡Golazo!
TimeStamp: 22h00 CET
The following is a Public Service Announcement
The following announcement must be read in the voice of the current president (edging on “overlord” status) of The United States of America.
Ladies and gentleman… The 45th President of The United States of america.
Scene One: Donald Trump is seen and heard speaking to the First Lady before boarding a jet airplane to the Great State of Texas:
Donald Trump:
— Honey, wear this military parka on your way to “Tostada Summer Summer Camp*”
… as heard on The Bill Maher Show. In Real Time, of course.
The first lady responds:
Melania:
— Are you sure, master, isn’t it a bit strong given the controversy already taking place?
… go to sleep little Trump.
Donald Trump:
— Hush, little darling. You’ll wake up the kids… look how pretty, Ivanka looks sleeping on her FOX News lair; Ewe know Melania, that bed she’s laying on was a gift from Lying Laura, she’s such a good Goobles student. She’s Great.
Melania:
Whatever you say, master.
The FOX’s LAIR—Sleep little princess.
Donald Trump:
Listen, darling, never mind the message of the Military Parka, it’s a message for Derek Waters at DRUNK HISTORY (USA) it’s supposed to be a really — really funny pun, Ewe see Derek never served in the military… JUST LIKE ME, THE COMMANDER OF THE NEW SPACE FORCES COMMAND, Ewe like that, Melania? SPACE FORCES COMMANDER!!!
Melania:
Sure, master, whatever you say.
Drunk Service… be all that Ewe can be! WEEKEND EDITION FOLLOWS! Stick around. It’s about an engagement 15 Years in the making and it happens ALMOST LIVE, only, on MSNBC.
NOTE FROM FIELD MARSHALL GEORGE CARLIN:
FUCK DONALD TRUMP, this is a PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT.
No mannequins were hurt in the making of this blog; all mannequins are courtesy of Loveland’s Colorado artist: JOHN deANDREA, now being featured at the VALLOIS Gallery in Paris, 75006.
Complément de Affaire — CERFA n° 13473*01 — Una música VISCERAL
Timestamp: Diez (minas) y un Cuarto, en la Rue Saint-Loius en L’Île… en Central Siren Time.
Yes indeed Cousin Joe, Yes INDEED, meet BRONTIS À LA PRÉFECTURE de Paris. •–_!_-* Fun fact
Ewe’all: did you know that The White House has been, —since way before— Henry’s fixes at La Fútbol Asociación? SINCE Way before —EWE’ALL— Kissinger fixed the Chilenean World Cup of September 11 of 1973— now drink that Water and hold Mika’s hand, Cousin Joe— G’ahead, Cousin Joe, hold her pretty Department of State hand.
La Concha de tu Madre—reLoaded!!!
Complémént de Affaire, CERFA n° 13473*01
Line five out of six:
suivez-moi-millennial-Siren
… but first, the news.
The following must be read in a George Cloony voice with a Laughing Cha Cha Cha playing on the background.
Extinct relatives. The last time that these two were seen together, the climate conditions called for a cool overcoat. Right now the season is warm and it is inevitable to avoid seeing undies on the streets, don’t blame us for catching an occasional glimpse—heck, one needs not look ‘sous les jupes de fip’, Mika, if you know what “Eye wanna Hold Your Hand,” means. •-_!–• There’s a new kid in town, let’s hope that under this Summer’s Sun that ride doesn’t go the way of the GoBee Bike and the benevolent Sac–a–dos.
Indeed, it was a rather naive “présentation sur « papier libre » du projet de creation du plan d’affaire” on account of the GoBee Bike project.
Maybe, just maybe the timing was wrong for project GoBee Bike to hit the scene at the dawn of the Great VELO War of 2017, when Velib’s changing of the guard was about to take place and three other private bicycle providers were dumpping their “güilas” all over the Île-de–France.
I’ll be blunt, GoBee Bike first mistake was trusting les Francilliens with such thin spokes, I mean it did not take a week to see young-adults punishing the GoBee Bikes everywhere. When the month of March 2018 arrived the streets of Paris were pretty much a junk yard littered with the fleet of GoBee’s that ended up as parts–and–pieces of a pretty neat service… but the other players in this business of transportation choices, they just couldn’t let GoBee Bike be.
In my non–consequential opinion the foul was not “kids just being kids”, there is a lot of money to be made in the alternative public tranportation business, and GoBee Bike didn’t think that it’s delicate rims would be sabotaged by the competition.
There’s a new kid in town, y se llama Patín del Diablo, from the creators of Green Hell and The Last Caress.
TimeStamp: 13h20
Dear, Brontis à La Préfecture… the following must be read in an AMAL CLOONEY’s voice:
Service Continu…
Dear, 6éme Bureau á Cité; please be adviced that my client has already furnished your office on two occassions with the current demand from your email on line five of six, on the Complément de Dossier request, date stamped on May the 24 of 2018.
Sincerely,
Amal Cloony, Barrister–at–Large.
London.
Agnes, won’t Ewe make the Axolotl’s suits and hook’em up with a few “paper dolls”… of course Ewe would. Thank’s.
p.s.: please do not force our firm to stash our client at the Equatorian Embassy should your office deny him of his “titre de sejour” renewal.
Bah—Oui, Truman Burbank: “Everything is recorded”
Complémént de Affaire, CERFA n° 13473*01
Line five out of six
A….joint.
But first: The News:
Slovenian mannequin… TimeStamp: 11h30 In CET. }–—–~~~\*> Some say that it was because of the first lady, others that it was because of the first daughter, cynics and semiologists seem to agree that it was in fact, “bad television” the kind of stuff that the mayority of people don’t want to be reminded of, you know; stuff like trains rounding and carring off the jews (mostly) into the guarded compunds where men, women and children would be separated forever. Donald Trump is a reality television producer, and he—and—he alone arrived to the conclussion that even Dr. Goebbles would understand that the audio tapes of crying toddlers asking for their parents, and euphamisms for concentration camps with nomenclatures such as, “tender age shelters” was just really–really–really bad television because it turned off a lot of the people that thought that they could not get enough of Donald Trump and the greatest reality tv show on the face of a dying planet. In any case scenario, we [the] staff, would like to point our that we dig’ her stance on her husband’s cruel and unusual policies, and would like to take this opportunity to also add a Slovenia’n National dress on one of John DeAndrea’s nude mannequins, just in case he (Donald Trump) forgot that his wife got into The United States —and stayed— by any means necessary… including fornicating with a man like him.
…
We are now officially in Summer Time countdown, this year, the longest day of the year was shortened by two-hours—truly Trino*, the terrorist have won. Last year and the year before, the Fiesta de la Música in Paris went until 2 a.m., for the 2018 edition la juerga corre hasta la media noche… Now, Ewe don’t have to go home, but Ewe can’t stay over yonder near the corner where i sleep, eh…
Coming up: Fake News vS. Media P.I., starring Laurène Loctin and Aude Favre.
TimeStamp: 9 minutes for France opportunity for a SHOT at winning for the first time on Russian soil; it’s not Winter, so the odds, Napoléon, are looking swell.
18h43 in Central Europe Time
19h04… Huh, who would have thunk it, FIP went on Strike and cancelled the Fiesta de La Musica. It seems that “La comadre Lety” y el resto de los Technicians no estan de acuerdo con el contrato colectivo y cerraron el changarro… por otro lado, solo a unos periodistas se les puede ocurrir programar un debate sobre “fake news” cuando la música y el Sol suena y calienta afuera de La Canopée à Châtelet. En fin.
… al salir de la Canopée y El Fake News Colloque era el minuto 84’
Croacia 2 – Argentina… LA CONCHA DE TU MADRE!!!
Minuto 90’
Croacia 3 – Diego Llora.
3 minutos de compensación
Croacia 3 — Argentina 0
BROZOvic entra a la cancha y argentina se regresa a Buenos Aires en un Vuelo De AEROMÉXICO.
TimeStamp: 21h52 in Central Europe Time!!!
Oh, The Humanity!!!
In other topics, it’s handicapable month at La Canopée, tonight’s Fake News —information— session was geared toward the hearing impaired, Media p.i. is what one might call a information clearinghouse for the deaf.
It turns out, from what we [the] staff could gather from our kindergarden level French, that aside from the professional peddlers of sucker media juice for the brain dead, it is that the motherfucking subtitles on BFM TV —por decir— that are all out of wack; no wonder my French is all, let’s just say —twisted. I tried to learn the language of love and diplomacy through the BeFeMer’s closed captioning system and all i got as feedback from the locals was a kick in the ass and a persona non—grata card. THANK’s BFM!!! Youg Fucks!
TimeStamp: Dust in the wind at Dauphine Square, at « Paire & Fils » with a Fender Strat and Trumpet sounding at sunset… followed by: Marie’s her name. 22h35.
22h50 My favorite Square in Paris… Carolina graces this place and the mood is all BARBARA: Black Eagle / L’Aigle Noir. En voz, de Joël Dalle, quien arremetió con « Pour un flirt… comme toi »… de un tal Michel… 75006 Rue Mazarine / Rue de Seine.
23 HUNDRED HOURS!!! HAWAII 5-0 at the other end of Rue Mazarine entronque con Rue Gueneguad… music by a an all Brass Band with Tri-tom… they follow with THE CURE mash-up!!! A mash-up Ewe’All!
Le Lion est mort ce soir, versión POW WOW, con 4 tubas y un chingo de fierros… No LLORES POR MI argentina—follows.
23h25 Place d’Acadie… CHAVOS RUCOS!!!
The What? — The Who… puto!!! Don’t be FOOLED AGAIN!… 23:30. THE EXODUS IS HERE!
The What? — The Who… puto!!! Don’t be FOOLED AGAIN! }—–—~~~\*> for follow-up visit: EelPieBand on their fucking facebook page… Ewe get a freebie, Zuckerberg.
23h45… Can Ewe see The REAL ME, Brontis?
00:14… This is my GENERATION, and with it the SUMMER ENDED AND THINGS GOT HOT—MOTHERFUCKING HOT, y’all.
… fuck the curfew: 00:39 Rue l’arbre sec … « do the walk of life »…
Note from Fenster the COPY–Editor:
This entry was corrected for dangling participles.
Las Fuentes de doña Vilma:
Like an X-Ray… ISSY, Corazón—Eye Hear Madrid ah–Knocking; what i don’t Know is if la 6éme bureau à Cité et moi, See “i 2 i”, can Ewe smell what this Rock is cooking?
Wait for it, wait…
“Well Did EWE Evah? — Complémént de Affaire, CERFA n° 13473*01
Good Afternoon Marianne.
It’s 4:20 in CET… Shall we continue with this Dance…
might as well —i mean— You know, to welcome Ringo Starr and “La Fiesta de La Musica” en toda LA FRANCE… Night and Day, Baby… Day and Night.
Dear Marianne: With all due respect, i have already explained several times — sur papier libre — what your people at the 6émé bureau call a “projet de création de plan d’affaire,” and although, Baby, some of the key players* les “héroes de feuilleton” have changed teams in this most non-consequential saga; “The Song,” Marianne — “Remains the Same.” Cordialmente, armando segovia.
Si la foto es buena…
Context on line five follows… it’s the 11th Hour and we send a Shout Out to TRMS and — La larme vue dans le monde entier!
I know, Marianne, — i know what’s going to go through the minds of the reviewers of my most inconsequential CERFA formulaire at le 6éme bureau when they see one of Barbara’s line on a Parisian trash can with a perfectly good and, might we add; sealed « matin léger » six pack… now, if we [the staff] knew anything about subtilité, we’d tell you that it’s because a « matin léger » is « facile à digérer »…
What do You say we take a pause from the dance and instead play « hardball », eh?
Issy, BARBARA, whereever You might be, “Si la foto es buena”, sure the theme of the lyrics changed, but the abominable Cruel and Unusual form of punishment patterns are ALL THERE, down to the « President’s Wife », eh? — ScreenGrab is courtesy of The Chris Matthes Show and his access to the archives of the National Broadcasting Company… ISSY, Marianne, the good thing about this most non—consequential blog is that the French don’t have a National Broadcasting COMPANY, eh!
TimeStamp: 01h00 in CET
… and no Marianne, we [the staff] have not, we repeat—to quote Chris Matthews— have not done a single “backflip” since we’ve landed on the CDG, no Ma’am. Instead, Marianne, what we’ve had to do since day 8th, when the Year of Mexico in France was put in the garbage can is a bunch of motherfucking forward somersaults.
And, as a matter of fact, one of these piruetas pa’lante was a response to Brontis à la préfecture rejection for the renewal of the second part of the permit that we [the staff] identified as a “blank card” to basically swim like fish in water when it came down to gathering the elements of a story about corruption and privilege.
We call these maromas, tangentes interesantes, or Cross Media Tangents.
The Little Red Girl… ISSY, Marianne, soon after Brontis à la préecture confiscated our « titre de sejour » and with it our both of our feet—along with our shoe leather reporting credentials— Donald Trump came into the Mexican scene, and to quote the « Ministry », “THERE WAS ONLY ONE THING THAT I COULD DO” and that was, to “ding–a–ding–long” my SEIS GRADOS de Kevin Bacon, i had to develop a way to keep my honing my craft while keeping the ingredients within the tropes and topics of the “melting pot” that gave Country, and my early “horn of plenty” childhood formation that infused my soul; REMEMBER MARIANNE, Que Yo Soy Un Producto de la S.E.P.—eh!
… in Central Europe Time it’s six hours to summer solstice, right now Robert Zimmerman is strumming the Tombstone Blues, or some “great commander–in–Chief” saying “death to all who shed a tear,” or something like that—hell, Raquelito, Dylan even ended the song with how “Ewe gotta put a Wall—over here,” can you believe how the times seem to not be changing!
TimeStamp 06h29 in CET.
TimeStamp: Flipsville… in Siren Central Time
The Longest Day Follows.
