Tag Archives: *Dangling Participle — Elise Jordan

USA not to scale, more/less the size of a banana

l’A-bun÷dan+CIA y el ten-eh=D’or.

 

Over in Nantucket Bay, Elise Jordan is inflating the swing and the focus group just don’t care. Sources close to the Status Quo relay that if the Republican ticket wins the Maine vote, it means that Donald John Trump turned the USA into à México universe of 1976… Lopez Portillo can’t shine a light to all of thee MAGA INC. débutantes in House districts across Nantucket.

https ://www .bbc.com /news /Guantanamo Greenland

Note to editors : if youse keeping track, the only fantasy that continues to hold the greaT statE of Maine is of course The Republic and its constitution, not The Atlantic or any “Guantanamo Bay” in Denmark.

And as if that wasn’t a small fry to swallow, more G.I’s are illegally entering via body bags through Dover Air Funeral Base while the Secretary of Regional Conflicts is busy being a cheerleader for the SOF* Magazine crowd.

*~. Soldier of Fortune.

Good lorde! Is that a “rachel” next to an “afro”?

Breaking in Hilo, Hawaii… the World Meteorological Organization has officially run out of human names and is now relying on the TeleTubbies to name meteorological phenomena over THE SEA.

THE LALA Hurricane ignored 🏌 by President Donald Trump.

 

Eye swears Jacqueline Alemany, youse gonna have to call that old geezer to set and have… have him improv from the curl catalogue, but if he’s not available that Mexican chic blushing your BLUE face today will also dew. Any hoot, where was i?

Ah, yes… Christopher Nolan (apparently) has never been to Spain, or Greece for that matter, and here is why Alemany :

https ://www .fotogramas .es /la-odisea-pelicula-christopher-nolan-experto-helenista-pedro-olalla-errores-opinion/

becuase Reagan nostalgist and yacht owner, Joseph Charles Scarborough the third, dis-virtues John Leguizamo’s role of the pig hearder when that pundit follows just the money-money and the Game of Thrones themed Laestrygonians… but worst still, turning Circe into one of those old hags from the GRIMM BROTHERS fairy tales… i wonder why, and then Öüï remembers that Odysseus played a certian “WILHELM” in tale about the Black Forest or something like that.

IMAGINE!!! Elise Jordania, imagine if Terry Gilliam had taken such liberties with the role of “Cardinal Fang” in my favorite part of Spanish history as viewed from a ‘flying circus’, —WHY i bet that the road to Damascus would have taken a short 🌋cut through Montserrat 🍹 in the Caribbean 🏴‍☠️ just to hook up with Calypso for some “lotus” shrooms… by those same standards (or jaladas… ask the MEXICAN on the set) Paul would most certainly LET IT BE and see “Mother Mary” next to him.

I tell you what Jacqueline Alemany, it’s no coincidence that on this calendar, yet again there’s Damon fucking DOGMA on the assomption of l’Assumption.

Captivos y pecadores… Matt Busby, dig it

But first! Eye is up, GÜEY, too early because Öüï had to walk Eugene Daniels and his pooch.

It took a day in the life of Cyprus 🇨🇾 but the BBC can now relay that yes, the Rosbifs 🇬🇧 will allow the use of their bases next to Aphrodite’s birthrock near Limassol in order to facilitate Netanyahou’s 🇮🇱  peace 🕊️ prize ⚔️ crusade.

https ://www .bbc .com /at-least-153-dead-after-reported-strike-on-school-Iran says.

To They in South Africa.

 

In Washington, Marie Gentric just graduated from l’image de France to the silhouette of The District, but that’s only because the Frogs have agreed to help Benjamin Netanyahou erase the “memories” of Jeffrey Epstein and Donald John Trump.

F-15E pilot was trained at the Dick Cheney Shooting School of Desert Storm.

 

And isn’t it ironic, David Ignatius, that just when the Iran national football team got a ticket for the FIFA World Cup, the death of 100-plus school girls in Tehran janks the boarding pass-over-to L.A.? Isn’t it, David Ignatius? Isn’t, IT!, ironic?

It’s way too early for sherry.

Note to Elise Jordan : not now Jordania, but if the Epic Distraction of The Epstein Files continues for more than 6 weeks you too may jump in with your fashion statement on the Morjo Show… nice collar you got there, big enough for a row of stars.

La Cágaste Kylian Mbappé, featuring David Summers

NOW IS KNOT the time TO TALK ABOUT THE WEATHER ☁️ 🌡️ ☁️ because it’s Ringo STARR’S birthday which, hcoincidentally matches THE ALASKA STATEHOOD ACT. Look it up KATTY KAY 🤩 It’s Raining Down In Texas and all of the Verizon Lines are down 🎸 🇨🇺 Hail, hail Harvey Oswald, and Fuck the lying 🤥 C.I.A..

A tail of two sirens… narrated by some nereid from the river Jordan.

Los Hombres G

vS.

Daft Punk

En bref, Una De Vaqueros.

 

But first, That Dumb Fuck, Donald Trump stars in the Western Classic

Remember The Guadalupe, Bitch

Synopsis: a spoiled silver spoon Vietnam Era draft-dodger cuts funding for The Federal Emergency Management Agency and TEXANS die starring Davy Crockett as the hachet man with the Bowie knife.

NOW IS THE TIME TO HUNT for undocumented MEXICANS in TEXAS, you crippled—fuck Governor of REDNECKS.

Shut your pie hole, Joe 🤐

👶🏼… and Ana Cabrona, this is what i’m talking about, Winona got a big brown beetle and she Rides it all the time.

Over at Émilia’s den, it’s “Carte Blanche” until the cows come home…

Premio 👋 Palmares…

 

But first, not to be outdone by Telemundo, France TV just invented “the telenovela”. Indeed, Ana Cabrona, put that pet chihuahua down, there’s plenty of leftover great dane meat from Émilia’s car jacking in El Ey.

But you better hurry Ana Cabrona, if you want it here it is, but you better hurry ‘cus Scooby is going fast, Elise Jordania is eating dog like the cannibal that she is, and you know Ewe should be glad.

Nevermind de todos modos, we now have an actual “ilLEGITimate bastard character to bring Ewe “Six Degrees of Mucho Bacon”:

Entertainment

In local news, Courtney Love, formally from Hole (it’s trou) was seen fuming from ears, nostrils, and… you get the idea, after learning that her late husband’s “drummer” corporate credit card was used not only to pay for whatever Ferrari he (Mr. Cobain’s drummer) wanted to purchase every six months, but also to pay for his bastard son’s happy meals—all those years ago.

https ://jang .com .pk /en /20381-dave-grohl-vows-to-regain-wifes-trust-after-having-illegitimate-baby-news

👶 🕳️🛸

Fifty Shades of Colt®️ — Fifty Shades of Gray in Mazan

The French Touch — Artificial Bets… 50 over 50 odds.

… and in Washington, Elise Jordania had flashbacks to her tweens³ in Mississippi.

³~. pré-ado, child : pre-teen.

Told y’all that Americans are stupid when it comes to metrics, and Ewe ain’t seen nothing yet, Elise Jordania, wait ’till Artificial Prostitutes seduce take over politics

“Daddy no!”…

In local news, God Bless Russian Television news… it‘s just the other face in the coin of Reaganomics.

Acuérdate de la sierra, María bonita — It’s Earth they

What Shu’gonna play now?… and Jimmy Norman suggests to James, “ha’Bout a Funky Cold Mazorka!?.”

In bloom… don’t know what, It!, means?

Welcome to Earth, they. At The Drive-inn in Cannes, at la Côte d’Azur, Akira Kurosawa watched a film-doc-Ewe—mentary about a Mexican presidential candidate who saw her life flashed before her eyes as she made her way from The Mountain Top, 17 slain contenders in the lead-up to the June 2 election did not have such luck, and perhaps that’s the buried lead on this cutline.

 https ://apnews .com /article /mexico-mayoral-candidate-killed-violence-elections

Meanwhile, back at the farm, Elise Jordan shaped-shifted to cubism and not to be outdone by her new boobs, Jordania got lip augmentation injections via French Air Mail.

Uso justo de La Vache.

… don’t go anywhere, below the fold it’s a closer look with a kind reminder that Öüí don’t select the ephemeral moments of the featured day (efeméride para los muy France-es-es) nor the delivery method, Eye just demands that all of the fits are news 📰 and that all of the news fit.

Blaxploitation Unlimited presents:

El primer torero negro.

Synopsis:

And Justice for All, happy Earth Day.

https ://genius .com /Metallica-blackened-lyrics

The term blackened actually means to scar by burning, decay or bruising – You can imagine hundreds of sudden nuclear weapon detonations scarring the Earth forever – blackening it.

 

Word of the Jeer: Canelo Gaslight

⛽🔥

“Remesas”… por tercera ocasión consecutiva el Diccionario breve de mexicanismos de don Guido Gómez de Silva, de la Academia Mexicana de la Lengua, selecciona la palabra remesas como la más popular en el Estado de JALISCO… allí en donde se dan los “canelones” cómo El Gran Campeón mexicano 🥊 Saúl Álvarez.

Vamos pues, a coger Tapa[s]tío.

Gaslighting 

Emily in Paris, in 20minutes with Cerf-panthére, and Diego Luna in Return of The Jeudi; Nº [ ] , page [ ].

There’s something about Munera on the 91.7 fm de Paris, 🌬️🎶 It’s probably Mí. In any case and/or Escenario, here’s last WEEK to Tepatitlán:

Remesa en Especie

Hechos hechos antes de echar las Palabras del Año.

{and}

Zodíaco line-up

In Washington, D C., Elise Jordan answered a casting call for the role of “La Barbie”, hilarity ensues when Florence Cassez is the director behind the Flic.

Choco-Lattes with Phat Basterd’

¡Luisa!, Luisa, ya te piratearon al Cruz Azul:

🎶 Ganador, oh oh

 

Et her, Brutus, does She agree?

https ://elpais .com /mexico /2022-10-24 /sheinbaum-sobre-la-formula-1-en-mexico-es-bastante-fifi. html

Señora, alcaldesa… los hijos de su patrón (López Obrador) son más fifi que La Chingada. and that’s a Phact in HousTon ☄️🌌🌠🪐✨🏎️🚂🐂, period!

Solo, Mazatlán es Bello… acompañado es un nido de NARCOS!

Ya llegó Nikki Lauda… ¡El muy CATrin!

But FO’ist, “yo no busco… », te encuentro, chiquita banana 🍌 en Francia

Primero el IMER y el Día Mundial de la Oh-Perha. Wagner y La Hija del Régimen ya están soplando La Flauta Mágica en la Ante-Cede de la ONU, quién también celebra su eclipse.

Mantas para dormir, ahora con BALAsTROS

En México, El présidente no ha firmado el presupuesto para los PUEBLOS INDIGENAS, lo que lo transforma en un Élégante Elefante indigenista como su tutor mayor, El Lic. Luis Echeverría Álvarez, y lo hipócrita ya no se le quita ni volviendo a nacer, o como dicen los “pare de sufrir” en Tennessee, even if he is Born Again †.

Lieutenant DAN!!! Elise ate all of the 🍤

…🎶 Tu me pides camarón y yo te lo voy a dar, yo te quiero con el alma… o algo así.