The following must bee read in a Cpl. Walter “Radar” O’Reilly’s bocina abocinada voice.

Attention camp:
You better not cry
You better not put
Eye’s gonna tell you why…

But first, a word from our non–sponsors, “Morning Mika and the blind Alabama Choir boy”:

[Cousin Joe]
— You know, Mika, I fell in love with Dr. Brzezinski, before I fell for your Down jacket look at the Capitol steps.

[Morning “hot Starrbucks” Mika]
— You did! Oh my god!
What was i wearing?

COUSIN JOE
— I remember it like I saw it Yesterday with my eyes wide shut, it was the PineApple jaune, the one that Matches the font on The Beatles “red” album.