The [Russian’s] Apprentice [agent] | PERFORMANCE REVIEW

From TINYpulse® to tinyHANDS.

[The following must be read in a Brian Williams voice
and framed with the talking head visual of Cousin Joe,
in the role of Edward R. Murrow].

“🎵🎵 In Europe and America there’s a growing feeling of HYSTERIA…”, not in Gordo’s wildest dreams of a Blue Turtle would he have thunk that the Ruskies would have the President of The United States in their pocket.

Good afternoon, today is Thursday, July 19 2018.
Today’s report features an exclusive peek at one of the most unheralded tools of international espionage: an agent’s performance review.

… right now, it’s 14h20 in Central NATO Time.
Stick around, we’ll be right back
FYI: Mika & Cousin Joe have the morning off.
Do not adjust your settings, Willie Geist is in Control.

Dear Beck Dorey–Stein;

Why in the Whole Wide World of Sponsored Sports would the Trump Administration require, or WANT a Stenographer in one of the corners??? of the Oval… now that, Willie Gueist is a Curve of a title, eh! Anygüey, we [the staff] failed Geometry so we’re not gonna get into the Angle of Beck Dorey-Stein’s memoire, except to say that Donald Trump would not need a full-time team of stenographers when Vlad “The Man” provided our current president with ‘bugs’ and microphones all over the White House, Trump Tower, and of course, the motherfucking PENTAGON.

Performance Appraisal


  1. Ackerman, S., “U.S. Officials at a Fucking LossOver Latest Russia Sellout“. Via: Persona Non Grata at “the” Daily Beast… with additional reporting with Stein, S.

« – il parlera de quoi, ton recit ?

— De la Russie d’adjourd’hui. »

Roman Sentchine
via:
Qu’est–ce que vous voulez ?
2018; Les Editions Noir Sur Blanc

Mean while at the OTAN Headquarters:

“I’ve seen that movie, too”… via: Francesca Tacchi’s “Historia Ilustrada del FACISMO”. Página 141; Ediciones Plaza de las Victorias.

I’ve already seen this movie before, it had however, different actors and a different agenda, but the plot, nonetheless remains the same. In other words Jon Meacham, Russia today was pretty much bitch–slapping The United States of America in the form of its sitting president humilliating NATO’s Secretary General, Jens Stoltenberg, during a breakfast photo–op earlier today.

TimeStamp: 14 hundred hours in Central NATO Time.

One thing for sure is that track 7 on Goodbye Yellow Brick Road is called “Jamaican Jerk-Off” and, that the entire world pretty much realized that some Monkey Business was about to happen the moment that The 45th President of The United States of America is going to meet Vladimir Putin (his Russian handler) in a closed room. There is no question on who of the two leaders at that exclusive setting is going to play “SUSIE“, which as a “Rocket Manconnaisseur, Donald J. Trump should know that that little ditty is TRACK 4 of Honky Château.

TimeStamp: Three hours for Game Time… PAN y CIRCO para toda la BREXIT Crowd…

Full Disclosure: The staff wishes to see a Final Match line up like this:

Francia vS Croatia

Furthermore… we the staff wish to see  Algerian ‘mecs’ go out Aux Champs-Elysées to honk their horns, just like last night.

… coming up: A Cat Named Hercules. Track 10, Honky Château; May 1972.