Ladies in Gemeni, welcome to our Pilot Edition of Bilingual Jeopardy, the show where anagrams, palindromes, maxims and metaphors are deciphered for a Stupid American audience who still believes that America (sin acento) is the center of the known Universe, or that the Mexican Hass avocado industry is in par with the “blood diamonds” market of a place called Africa… or something like that.
Bilingual Jeopardy is brought to you by the
Vicente Fox (Ltd.)
‘Warm and Fuzzy’ Ugg Boots…
Because as Bill Maher says,
“If you wanna feel a warm and fuzzy feeling during the Trump Administration, then just stick your dick in them”.
Ugg®️ Boots, they are made from
Ewes, —just like You.
… and still to come:
… en las milongas La Concha es otra cosa, and Mika on the MorjoShow has the Morning off.
“It’s just a metaphor”. The show where no Kings, or corrupt presidents, like say, Donald Trump… por decir, are never harmed during the taping of the show.
On the next episode of “It’s just a metaphor”, Adam ruins el guacamole, and Bill Maher thinks that everyone who watches the Superbowl can afford a Kilo of “blood diamonds”.
In The Mean Time
It’s 10 to Five
on The Pink Panther’s Penthouse…
as Colored by St. Germain,
or Henry Mancini
on a RockSteady Beat Ewe’All!
ISSY… forget about Jesús “el carpintero”, porque como dice Mario Gutiérrez Vega en el 88.1 de FM en la CDMX: en aguas revueltas… las bancas ahora caerán en las redes de Chuy “el pescador”; o algo así, Amén.
We [the staff] have never been to Anchorage, but we kind of like the halibut. Say the ladies all cook it well there, and they sure know how to serve it*.
Halibut, it sure is our 2nd favorite Whitefish, next to the poorman’s lobster: the Monkfish.
… Context on the Whitefish kickback to follow; intermittent connectivity and treacherous conditions are straining the flow of this transmission. During this difficult trial we ask that you please wait for the TimeStamp before assuming that a sentence is complete. Por ejemplo, Raquelito: TimeStamp: 0800 hours CET.
Hey there, Rachel, you’re old enough to remember this classic scene; you must however, read it in a Cheech Marín, voice: 🎤 Mexican Americans—love education, so they go to night school, and they take Spanish—and get “B”… “It’s like a protest tune.” . As a product of both the Mexican grade school system, and of one of the many–many–many independent (High School) districts in the Great State of California, i always found that entire scene funny —if not hillarious, and mostly because of how crisp and true it rang to all my fellow Chelas, and Chanos, sitting in High School next to me. Language barriers from English to Spanish were always a riot; not so much the other way around when the Sand Glass was flipped, because getting lost in translation from Latin American to White Anglo Saxon Politics was a diferent kind of riot, one with no punchlines, but rather punches for every point grounded in facts. From fellow students, to American History teachers, and of course my counselor: Uncle Sam’s America was always right, “here’s your “D” in American History.” Next year you are enrolled in “Home Ed” class. The note had to be signed by the “parental units,” i received the barely passing grade not for lack of knowledge (if i remember well) but for lack of attention and for disturbing the class… it was sometime between 1986 to ’89; Gibson hit one of the greatests home runs in “World” Series History, and yours truly was already soaked in testimonials and first person anecdotes about what went on in a ranch called Bufalo; but most important about the tales of the man who took down FBI agent Enrique Camarena… on the Billboard charts Point Dexter was feeling “hot-hot-hot,” just as Oliver North was raising his right hand in front of the Senate in order to justify “the gipper’s” Iran Contra “Gun Walking” program. Fucking Nancy was giving major Shade To Her Former Friend Rock Hudson: SHE JUST SAID NO to him when a Parisian hospital called to secure Ronnie’s support: REPUBLICAN COMPASION AT ITS Best! Oh, Isaac, those were the days my friend; those Were the days, Right, Sarah? —•¡•— TimeStamp: 14hoo on CET, piggybacking on the KasieDC time slot. Kasie, please don’t make fun (anymore) of that “dedicated follower of fashion” Donnie Deutsch… 🎵 “Oh yes he is—oh yes he is…”
Dear Rachel, thanks for not reading us. It really boosts our Morales, y como todos en Tijuana lo saben, eso es Terrible; anygüey Raquel, as we shadow-box with the News of the day we [the staff] cannot tell if you can spot the parallels between the ambush of the four G.I.’s in Niger, and the “Gun Walking Policies” (just  example) of how strategic U.S. Foreign Policy compromises American National Security in the first place … hold that thought, we see a blackout aproaching. TimeStamp: 1000 hours CET.
Two X-mas’ ago we [the staff] received a multimedia box set about “The Salt of The Earth,” or something like that. We never found the time to watch it (a second time) so the gift just sat there; waitng for someone to put it on the disk drive and hit the playback mode. •—¡—•. EFEMERIDE IMPROVISADA… fue PRECISAMENTE en un día como ayer, pero de 1945, cuando La Carta de Las Naciones Unidas entró en efecto, la organización de Países Alineados después de la 2da Guerra Mundial tenía … perdón tiene, sigueteniendo la esperanza de que todo el mundo algún día cante al unísono, la canción de Disneylandia: “It’s A Small World After All.”  .•—!—•. Let’s take this last theme song sentence up a notch, shall we? According to Sarah Chayes, a leading authority in the field of corruption, according to TRMS, and her work (Sarah’s not Rachel’s) in Afghanistan, “people subjected to systematic corruption react by going to extremes.” TRMS 23/Oct/2017. . If we heard right, Chayes attributes the success of the Boko Haram affiliate ambush in Niger as a territorial consequence, rather than an ideological inspired attack… i once had the very brief opportunity of exchanging “off the record” comments with a Food an Agriculture U.N. oficial, it was around the time when the current Mexican Secretary of the National Sports Commision, el licenciado Alfredo Castillo, was charged with disbanding the “auto defensas” in the Tierra Caliente of the State of Michoacán…. Hold that thought, right now we have to ‘race like a pissed horse’ and another blackout is headed to our parade. •—¡—• TimeStamp: 19h30 CET.
P.S. Dear Eric Holder, i have never been to Alaska; and you sure sound different as a private citizen, i take back the “Motherfucker” that i tagged you with [Sir] on a different post; until you go ahead with your decision to run for The Office. [Context follows].
* Based on a true Three Dog Night corrido en Inglés.
1 Maddow, R., “TRUMP FLOUTING NORMS RISK VENAL TURN IN US [sic]”, via: http://www.msnbc.com/rachel-maddow/watch/trump-flouting-norms-risks-venal-turn-in-us-1078348355534 Now then, Rachel, with regards to Sarah Chayes commentary about the report by Voice Of America (on its French language station), it turns out that one “liddle” piggy was sleep at the wheel, while the other “liddle” piggy (according to Politico [dot] com 19/9/2017) was having too much CRISPY SESAME beef with Donald Trump… (Please use a Bugs Bunny WWII correspondant voice when reading this reference).
“It turns out that this village was a << liddle>> contaminated by hostile forces… the unit stayed a << liddle >> longer than expected because, apparently people were aware that something [fishy, perhaps?] was going on.” }-~~•> Excerpt was piggybacked from a segment of the TRMS aired on Monday the 23rd of October, the link to that clip is hyperlinked in “Thing 2” below… the segment was the prelude to Eric Holder expert opinion on the relationship between the current Attornney Gral. of “King” Donald the boar, first of his name, and The White House.
… Did you know that it was the French who invented the Voice Of America? That’s why the Frogs are our first ally… “and now you know, the rest of the story.” —_~. Fair use of AFN and Paul Harvey..
3. Organizzazione delle Nazioni Unite per l’alimentazione e l’agricoltura, Internationale Atomenergie-Organisation, Internationale Fernmeldeunion, World Health Organization, International Monetary Fund, The World Bank, the Unesco (except in the U.S. Of A. and the Tribe of Israel), Union postale universelle, et. al…
Ensalada de maracas… entonando el átun (o las tuna’s en Inglés) allí mero por La Défense—Uso justo de Las Naciones Unidas y Direct Matin •—_—•. Foto por armando segovia / segoviaspixes 2017; copyleft. •—•. TimeStamp: 18h30 CET
Image courtesy of Radio France International, en Anglais, et certainement sans doute, avec la conscription du CNEWS Matin… remember, folks, when participating in “FreeStyle Hoboing” there is no better cushion for your cardboard mattress than good’ol crumpled up CNEWS direct Matin’s. The more in-your-face advertising that they use to cover the front page of each edition, the better it is for us [the staff]… o como dice el Pinche Brozo: porque CNEWS direct Matin tiene patrocinador, nosotros podemos dormir más calientitos y mejor! Ria_Ta-Ta—TEN-ga.
5 Pinche Politico, try a fucking salad instead… might we suggest a “French version” of the Mexican Maracas Salad, ingredients include: Minced Tuna and Red Beans; and let me tell you, Schumie: de que con el [Heavy] Nopal en la frente, y un gusto en particular por toda clase de frijoles en el mercado internacionalista, we [the staff] don’t mind the stereotype, because WE love Chech & Chong!