We now return to our coverage of The Wacky Big Rigged Races

We last left our heroine, Penelope Pitstop (and her Tiny groom) celebrating their new union, when asked for comment on why she is not competing (in reel—time) for the top position at The House, as she “drove from Paris to the Amsterdam Hilton,” Penelope replied that she was too busy thinking about “eating chocolate cake in a bag” in Vienna, —or some Opéra house like that!

And in the role of Tank Commander, Sgt. Blast, is Willie Geist. Congressman Scarborough is Private Meekly, the driver on this track.

… [A]nd in the role of Penelope Pitstop:
Alexandria Ocasio–Cortéz
U.S. Representative
(N.Y.C. 14th Arrondissement
“the purple block”)

Meanwhile back at The Pharm…

https ://thehill .com /policy /healthcare /530695 –pfizer-says-no-covid-vaccine-production-problems-or-shipment-delays

The “Mean Machine” managed to successfully compromise the logistical distribution manifest by 900 K serum units, leaving the rest of the racers out of gas in “the middle of the road” (to be continued)… al Azar, la Ocasió(n) no debe desperdiciarse, Congresswoman.

The big hat of Richard Dastardly is being filled by Avi Velshi* while the fleas on Muttley are being fed by Jimmy Fallon (of The Tonight Show fame).

* Avi Velshi is a man of many hats, Fallon only has one laugh in his repertoire and a single shimmy dance.

Over at The Defense track…

The Army Surplus Special remains bound by the Uniform Code of Military Justice therefore, Sgt. Blast and his driver private Joe (of Morning Joe fame) remain committed to the Outgoing Administration (nº45), and so our favorite Frankenstein tanker is protecting Dixieland bronze-age heroes instead of delivering “boobies-friendly” body armor for American FEMBOTS on the frontline.

jump to page 34 on “20 Seconds”, via 20 minutes for today’s question of the THEY, what keeps you up on Way Too Early?